Equals A Equals

By Michael The Libertarian 

       
        Anyone that knows me knows that I like my life to be ordered and non-chaotic.
        That doesn't translate to "rigid", friends. I can be spontaneous. That's not an issue, but I like to have things where I know they're going to be. i.e; I like my soda coaster in (roughly) the same spot, all the time on my computer desk. I like my pretzel snacks for when I'm watching TV, to be where I left them, the last time. I like my CD/DVD collection to be alphabetical and then, chronological.
        Because of this, some people have suggested that I'm "compulsive" or "obsessive". Nothing could be further from the truth.
        So, this morning, I was separating my red, white & blue M&Ms into three plastic cups and I decided to address this.
        It's true that I prefer "even numbers". My ice cube trays have 16 cubes. There's a reason for that. So, when I take the cubes out, if one cracks, another gets thrown into the sink with it. Even numbers. It doesn't hurt anything. I only use tap water to make my ice. Where's the harm?
        I can counter that, though. I use nine-gauge (.009" first string) strings on my guitars. Odd number, but it is the gauge that works best for me so my desire for even numbers does NOT "control my life". If I'm watching TV, late at night and I don't want to keep my better half up, I have no problem with putting the volume at "13" if that allows me to hear the idiotbox without disturbing her.
        So, what's with the even numbers and super organization, then? Well, some have posited that I suffer from O.C.D., as I said earlier. First of all; C.D.O. would be better because it's alphabetical, the way it's supposed to be. That said, I deny the accusation because (I think) I've already given evidence that my desire for a smooth-flowing, well-organized set of constants in my life doesn't negatively impact my life.
        I drive at the speed limit. On most of the roads I find myself, that's usually thirty-five, forty-five, or sixty-five M.P.H.. Those are NOT even numbers!
        The thing is, when I was just a wee scad, my uncle taught me about this computer command - I don't even remember which computer language it is. This command stated: "=A=". It tells the computer: "When you're finished reading the file, leave the file as it is."
        That's a pretty reasonable command. If you ask me to borrow my lawn mower, I expect to find it in the same spot in the garage from whence you retrieved it. I expect to be sitting at my computer desk and be able to reach right where my soda cup should be and for it to be there. I expect to be watching my "guilty pleasure" TV show and be able to casually reach for my pretzel snacks and find them.
        When I decide I want to watch a movie or listen to a CD, I should know where to find the particular title I have a hankerin' to watch. No?
        Does anyone really believe this means I suffer from C.D.O.?
        I'd argue with you more, but I have to get back to separating my M&Ms before 10.00 hrs.



                - Michael